Oh, teenagers. They're tricky, aren't they? They're almost adults, but not quite yet, but will be soon so better get them ready! It's a lot of pressure. When I heard about What Do You Say? How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home by William Stixrud, PhD, and Ned Johnson, I was on board. A clinical psychologist (Stixrud) and a test prep teen coach (Johnson) have studied what teens need to be successful and how parents can help and then get out of their way. They promote a "parent as consultant" philosophy which focuses on helping kids learn to run their own lives.
Here are a few fantastic quotes from the book:
Kids maximize [their] potential by creating a life they want. We want to make sure that any pressure put on our kid isn't actually about us, and the communities we've become invested in.
Your job is not to control your kids, but to help them learn to control themselves.
A strong connection with a parent is the closest thing to a silver bullet for preventing mental health problems in kids.
This all sounds like excellent advice to me. I have one child that will be leaving for college in less than a year and one only a few years behind. I want them to be able to make good choices for themselves and I'm doing what I can now to help with that. I really enjoyed this book and I hope it will be useful.
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