Full Frontal Feminism

Over the last several weeks I have been reading this book:  Full Frontal Feminism by Jessica Valenti.  After watching "Iron Jawed Angels", I wanted to do a little research myself.  I found a few books about the suffragists and I also came across this book by Valenti.  I had seen it before and it was on my "To Read" list so I thought this would be perfect timing. 

The cover says "A YOUNG WOMAN'S GUIDE TO WHY FEMINISM MATTERS", and I would consider that a fair description.  This book was aimed at a reader who is younger, single and without children, most likely in her late teens and early 20s.  However, I still felt I learned a lot.  In fact, I wish I had read this as a younger woman.  It's never too late to learn anything.

Valenti is often irreverent and rather potty-mouthed, but it totally works.  I loved her chapter "Feminists Do It Better (and Other Sex Tips)".  These are our bodies and we should be the ones deciding what we do with them.  In an aside, she adds that "In Mississippi you can buy a gun with no background check, but vibrators are outlawed."  How absolutely insane is that?  I remember back when we lived in Texas, a woman was arrested for daring to host a "Passion Party".  About that Valenti says "Apparently, in Texas you can sell vibrators, but only if you sell them as 'novelties' or 'gag gifts.'  Selling them in any way that admits their actual role in sex is the illegal part."  Seems a little backwards to me.

She also writes about how pop culture has become "pornified" and is focused on telling us that our only value is in our ability to be sexy.  If we don't accept that, we're prudes.  If we do and embrace it, we're sluts.  Subheadings is this chapter include "Be a Virgin...But Be Sexy"and "Be Available...But Unattainable".  I love that she calls out all that crazy stuff. 

She discusses violence against women.  "The South Carolina House Judiciary Committee voted in 2005 to make cockfighting a felony, but tabled a bill that would have done the same for domestic violence."  Now doesn't that make you want to say "What the F...?"  You can understand her ''colorful language."

As you might expect, she has a chapter about reproductive rights.  It doesn't get more feminine (and feminist) than having babies or not having babies.  A frightening statistic she lists:  "Only one in five women knows about emergency contraception, and one-third of those women confuse EC with RU-486, the abortion pill."  These are our bodies and we have a responsibility to understand and care for them.

Valenti's goal is to educate young women of our rights and our responsibilities.  We must understand what is going on the in world around us and we must be involved.  It is vital that we vote and make our voices heard.  Our grandmothers fought for our rights, we are obligated to use them.  I hope you'll give this book a read and share it with someone. 

Here are a few links listed in this book that I found very interesting:

Feministing

Rock 'n' Roll Camp for Girls

The Whitehouse Project

Women's Voices, Women Vote

Twilight by Stephenie Meyer

Hey, don't judge.  If you've noticed, I've had a lot of heavy stuff on my reading list lately.  After finishing Winter Garden, I was in desperate need for something light, fun and easy.  Something that wouldn't cause my entire body to dehydrate through my tear ducts.  This was my fourth journey through this book and of course I still like it.  I was slightly tempted to continue on through the series, but I won't.  I have a book on hold for me a the library that I have been waiting to read:  Never Let Me Go by Kazou Ishiguro.  I'll save a full Twilight series rereading for November, just before part one of the last film is released.  Now, on to finish my book about feminism.  Very interesting.

Winter Garden by Kristin Hannah

This month's book club selection is Winter Garden by Kristin Hannah. 

I loved this book, but before we talk about it there is something I need to tell you about how I read.  When I pick up a book, I become very involved with it.  The characters are real people to me.  The events are really happening.  I imagine myself in each character's shoes.  I feel what they feel.  Of course these feelings are multiplied if the story is based on historical fact.  Also, I am what some people might call "a big boober."  I'm a cryer.  It's something my husband just doesn't get: "But it's not real."  "But you've read that book/ seen that movie before.  You know what's going to happen."  To his credit, mostly he just shakes his head and smiles, tells me he loves me and kisses me on the top of my head. 

Last night I finished Winter Garden.  As soon as the kids were in bed, I crawled into my own bed determined to finish the book.  Thank goodness I was all alone in there- the blubbering was uncontrollable.  Winter Garden is about two grown sisters and their 80-something-year-old mother.  The sisters do not have a close relationship and the bond they have with their mother is, well, non-existent.  As their mother begins to finally share her history with her daughters, they all learn things about each other and about themselves that they had never known. 

I can't even begin to know what to tell you about this book.  It was wonderful and heart-rending and powerful and painful.  I loved it.  I wept.  I sobbed.  I may have even wailed a bit.  (Seriously- it was not pretty.)  My sister has a new book club and when she finished reading, here was her post on Facebook:  "Just finished my book club book...and an entire box of Kleenex."  I would love to tell you more about it, but I just can't.  Even though I finished the book last night, it is still haunting me. 

This morning I did a few Google searches about the Siege of Leningrad.  The photos are frightening, the stories tragic.  More than a million people died of sickness, starvation and cold.  I imagine the reason I know so little about this must have something to do with the fact that the Cold War strongly influenced our perspective on Russian history. 

This is a book I would heartily recommend.  I hope you will pick up a copy.  May I also suggest a fresh box of tissues?  Preferably the kind with lotion- you'll thank me later.  Once you read it, let me know.  I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Room: A Novel by Emma Donoghue

Last night I finished reading Room: A Novel by Emma Donoghue.  This book was given to me by a dear like-minded friend and I can't wait to discuss it with her.  It is the story of a 19-year-old young woman kidnapped and held captive in a 12 by 12 foot soundproofed shed.  The book begins 7 years after her capture and is told from the perspective of her 5-year-old son.  Uh-huh.  You read that right.  She has a son while she is in captivity.  Fathered by her captor.  This was a tough read. 

At one point, I had to call my dear friend and ask her if I really had to keep reading.  Then I did something I never ever do.  I asked her to tell me if these characters would have a happy ending.  I know that is totally against the rules, but I just didn't think I could finish if they didn't all live happily ever after.  And now I will tell you what she said so that you can decide for yourself if you want to read this:

**Spoiler**

They do live happily ever after and I was happy with the ending.

Now I only tell you that because it was so important to me to know.  I just couldn't keep reading about their horrible living conditions without some reassurance of light at the end of the tunnel.  Now I know that my previous reviews have contained quite a bit of discussion, but I feel like I can say no more about this novel.  It's one of those stories that you just have to experience as you read it.  I think it's important to feel what the 5-year-old boy feels and see what he sees. 

I really did love this book and I hope you will read it.  When you do, post a comment and tell me what you think.  If we know each other personally, please call me so we can discuss it.  I would love to hear what you think. 

Water for Elephants

February's book club selection is Water for Elephants by Sara Gruen.  I had seen this book on many a bookstore shelf over the last couple of years, but it had never really grabbed my attention.  I can't believe what I was missing!  This book was rich and textured and gritty and beautiful.

It's an emotional tale of one man's accidental circus life.  In Water for Elephants, Jacob Jankowski is a ninety-something year-old man remembering his time with the Benzini Brothers Most Spectacular Show on Earth.  I found the present-day scenes in Mr. Jankowski's nursing home heartbreaking.  After living such an exciting life it must be especially trying being relegated to a corner of the world where his greatest fantasies are either one more "roll in the hay" with a woman or maybe just an ear of corn on the cob.  Mr. Jankowski takes great offense at the mushy, tasteless food he is allowed.  When one particularly kind nurse brings him her fruit salad and he sees that it includes apple he can't speak for the tears he is attempting to contain.  Of this nurse, he says, "I'm so used to being scolded and herded and managed and handled that I'm no longer sure how to react when someone treats me like a real person."  Then as he is remembering his wife's swift decline and death, I was unable to contain my own tears.  I'm sure I looked like a fool, walking down the sidewalk returning from the bus stop, reading a book and blubbering.  "Although there are times I'd give anything to have her back, I'm glad she went first.  Losing her was like being cleft down the middle.  I wouldn't have wanted her to go through that.  Being the survivor stinks." 

The descriptions of life in the circus were full of moments I never could have imagined.  Sara Gruen researched so many different aspects of the circus and it seems none of it went to waste.  Mr. Jankowski becomes the circus veterinarian.  At one point, he is giving fruit to an orangutan and is shocked when the animal seems to thank him.  And this is, after all, titled Water for Elephants and Rosie, the elephant is an actual character not just piece of the background. 

I really can't say much more without retelling the whole story- and you can bet that I'm tempted.  I can't wait for our book club discussion.  I will also be sure to see the film version that will be released this coming April.  I can only hope it will be as good as the book, but there is a lot to live up to here.

Iron Jawed Angels

Okay, so I know this is supposed to be a book blog, but I just can't stop myself from sharing this wonderful film with you.  I hope you'll forgive my digression. 

Recently, while reading the homeschooling section of Pioneer Woman's website, I came across a discussion about the women's suffrage movement.  Over and over again readers were recommending this film so I just had to see it for myself.  And since my wonderful library system had it in stock, I was able to get it quickly and for free (it doesn't get much better than that, does it?).  This HBO produced film was released in 2004 and won Anjelica Huston the Golden Globe for Best Supporting Actress.  The film also stars Hilary Swank as Women's Rights Activist Alice Paul, Frances O'Conner, Vera Farmiga and Patrick Dempsey. 

This was a fascinating chronicle of a pivotal event in American history about which I ashamedly know very little.  Well, that's about to change.  My curiosity has been sparked and I can't wait to learn more.  I hope you'll take the opportunity to view this film and share it with the other women in your life. 

And like the tag line says, "Lead, Follow or Get Out of the Way."

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Just a disclaimer:  While I think it is important we share this with our daughters, and I hope you will, I recommend your viewing it first.  There is one scene in which the character played by Hilary Swank spends a little alone time in the tub.  Just sayin'.   

Bitter Is the New Black

A lovely lady in my book club (you know how I love my book club!) lent me this book, Bitter Is the New Black by Jen Lancaster.  It's been out for a while- published in 2006- but this was the first I had seen it.  Jen Lancaster describes it as a "layoff memoir" and it is wonderful.

The book begins with descriptions of Jen's fabulous life- Prada handbags, Ralph Lauren Capri pants, and a list of regularly scheduled spa services (she says her favorite is the simple mani-pedi: "They work on your hands and feet at the same time while you sit in a vibrating chair.  I call it the sorority girl's version of a threesome.").  She is, well...a little umm...witchy with her criticisms of other people, but her one redeeming quality is that she usually keeps these criticisms to herself, thinking them for the reader's benefit and not saying them aloud.  The book is filled with the most deliciously snarky little footnotes.  Really, I think one of the best things about this book is the footnotes.  So much fun!

Now I have one friend who said she quit reading after the second chapter because she thought Jen was just too mean, but she really should have kept reading.  I loved the scene where Jen is trying to get "half a dozen anorexic wannabe models" who work the reception desk at her salon.  By the end of the scene, I was begging Jen to strangle someone!  She remains far calmer than I could have done. 

Of course, this is a layoff memoir, so Jen is let go from her job that provided not only the lifestyle to which she had become accustomed, but also a great deal of her identity.  For months she searches for work.  She is turned down for jobs because she is over-qualified.  She is even turned down for a job that she almost had but lost because a "friend" swooped in and sabotaged Jen's opportunity.  And then she is forced to go to the unemployment office.  You can imagine how well she did there.

As she becomes aware that her financial situation is becoming more bleak, she concedes the need to move to a smaller, cheaper apartment.  And so she begins to pack.  This is the point where the new Jen really enters the world.  She can't believe all the "junk" she has:  All the bottles of expensive lotions that she never used, all the bottles of nail polish (many the exact same color), her ridiculous DVD collection, and finally her shoes and hand bags.  She monetizes each junk collection by calculating what she could have bought instead- COBRA health insurance, six months phone service, a year's worth of auto insurance, and a healthy money market account.  "I now understand that I have no right to bitch about being broke because I was really foolish with the money I had when I had it."

It is a beautiful thing to watch Jen grow and realize what is really important in life.  I loved her and I can't wait to read more of her books.  If you are interested, she has a blog of her own.  You can find it here.  A great book that I highly recommend- especially to my friends out there who have their own touch of the snark.  You know who you are...

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Oh!  And just a quick side note- I nearly DIED when Jen described her friend's wedding in the former Chicago Public Library.  Married in a library?  That is totally up this book nerd's alley!